Our inner and outer worlds are reflections of each other. If one thing isn’t right in one, you’ll feel it seep into the other somehow. In the HLM program, I help address different angles in your life’s inner workings and outer workings, sleep/energy, confidence, stress, and relationships. I take a deep look at what the person is eating and doing for self-care. I accept the mental, physical, and spiritual inventories into account. From there, we begin to shift, starting inward out. Sometimes, this shift will bring relationships together, and sometimes it will break relationships apart. Still, regardless of which way it goes, it’s always for the best.
Today I want to share with you two experiences from clients of how working through the Holistic Lifestyle Method helped them with their relationships.
Client A was stressed. She had what many women dream of having: a successful career, husband, and beautiful children. She had been accommodating all family members for a very long time, her children now full-grown her marriage years in the making; she had been putting herself to the side so often and for so long that her diet and self-care routine suffered. She barely heard herself think or feel. Her emotional problems had also turned into physical ones, and she was struggling with digestive issues and low back pain. Her body literally couldn’t tolerate this way of life any longer; she needed to heal. So she signed up for the HLM Program.
We pressed “reset” on her life, creating a new self-care routine. I prescribed specific meditation and breathing practices to help her sleep better, heal internally, and have more energy. We did weekly Somatic Experiencing sessions to help with calming down her nervous system and healing some attachment issues surrounding her parents. We also began to address foods that were aggravating her.
This took a little time, but she moved through the program very quickly because she did my suggested work.
She had a profound awareness at one point: she didn’t have a happy marriage. She felt better on her own, more fulfilled on her own. She couldn’t continue to believe the lie she told herself for so long; she didn’t deserve that, nor did her family.
At this point, you might be thinking, wait, what? This didn’t save her relationship. This isn’t a win. I can assure you full-heartedly that this is most certainly a win. Why?
Because she connected to HER TRUTH, this. Had nothing to do with my truth. I’m here to help my clients find their truths and live from there.
This created a significant shift in her life, leading to her being the strongest and happiest she’s been in years. PLUS, her physical ailments of poor sleep, digestive issues, and back pain all melted away once she started tending to her inner workings.
Client B was a stay-at-home mom. Three children, married, disappointing sex life, and though she led an active life, she was just bored with it in general. So, she began to seek out clarity with DIY practices. She started using the app ““calm” to meditate, took yoga classes regularly, and ate a vegan diet. But regardless of all these healthful changes, she was still feeling stressed all the time and still lacking clarity. She felt like she did everything for everyone and never set healthy boundaries, feeling that the word “NO” was her enemy. She didn’t listen to herself. She said, “I don’t know,” ALL the time when asked about how she was feeling… even when her body was screaming for her attention to stop what she was doing. She was utterly depleted and defeated.
She signed up for the HLM Program, and we changed her self-care practice completely. She was not doing the suitable yoga and meditation practice for her needs and body; both exasperated her stress and anxiety. I also shifted her diet because the foods she was eating were causing her also to be more anxious; none of them were nourishing her even though they were labeled as “healthy.” Within our work, I introduced her to the Lovingly Assertiveness script. She started communicating with her husband what she wanted. She spoke about what she needed in their relationship. She began building skills that she wished to and seeking jobs she wanted to pursue. She started was having way more fun; life was starting to feel like a party again.
She struggled to do what I suggested at first, finding it hard to let go of old ways and things she’d been hardwired to believe was good for her, but they weren’t; even her sex life wasn’t. She had been taught what she was supposed to like and accepted that this was just what life was. But the thing is, she didn’t like it at all, and it was time to speak her truth. We had to discuss how to experiment out of the box; the BOX is sometimes the problem. We can stuff ourselves so deeply in one that we cannot see or play with the toys that live outside of the box. We get too caught up and tripped up with the life we’ve surrounded ourselves with. We get stuck.
I developed a program that allowed her to start to play outside of the box and live a happier and more active, and more fulfilling life. What illuminated things for her realized she is a model for her daughter. If she continued the path she was going on, she was also becoming a model for unhappiness. Not the message she wanted to send to her daughter. These shifts we made not only made her happier but made her a more confident wife, lover, and mother. Sometimes, we must look at the choices we make for ourselves and understand how they affect the people we love; putting ourselves as a priority can be one of the most selfless acts in the end.
The Holistic Lifestyle method is created to be custom-tailored to your needs; together, we'll create a program that will help you become the highest version of yourself, giving you the power, knowledge, and confidence, you need to improve your relationships, understand what’s working, what's not and how to make impactful changes to heal your life from the inside out.
I would love to share the Lovingly Assertive Script with you to start making the inward shifts for a better outward life today.